PIECE OF SHIT MEN

Okay well R and I are no more.  I have to say that the reason I broke up with him over a week ago is because he was verbally abusive and even grabbed my wrist trying to take MY phone away from me.   At this time I FUCKING hate him!   He then told me stories of tracking down a woman who he gave money to in order to go see him then didn't.  He drove to PN we live in MD and when she didnt live where he though he was able to get her forwarding address and tracked her down and scared her to where she wanted to call the cops.  Hmmm does this guy sound like a prince or what???  I'm going to say WHAT??!!!    He is what I would call a pice of a shit. I can't even call him a man because he is not a man.  He runs from his fucking resposiblities. He just wants everyone to clean up a mess he helps make and then he is a okay and if I don't do what he wants when he wants then he makes threats about tracking me down and tries to scare me into doing what he fucking wants.  I got sick of him telling me to lose weight to go run eight miles, telling me that he didn't like having sex with me just to hurt me only to change his mind and say he missed me, having him call me Santa because I wore red PJs and a number or other really shitty things.  
  He gets mad at me for lying ot him when he ASKED me to and then I was afraid of him so I couldnt do it and THAT pissed him off more.    I know there is a part of me that says I am just angry and I will calm down and that I don't hate him and another part of me says I fucking hate him and hope his dick falls off!   Harsh, I know but, after all the times the bastard as made me cry, all the times I have been scared of him , and all the times where he just made me feel like shit and didn't treat me the way I deserve to be treated after all these times I can't help but, hate him.   I do have a part that cares about him and there is only reason why.  Hell he has accused me of sleeping with someone else, he has pretty much done everything that you shouldn't do.     It's no wonder no one ever wanted to be with him,  I wonder if he has ever hurt a female and either didn't get caught or she didn't report him.     He tried to appologise and say he won't ever do those things again but, I know what he is capable of so I know that, that is a lie.   He may try really hard not to be a piece of shit but, its in his nature.   Hell it's his fucking genetic gift.  His father is a Piece of shit and he is basically exactly like his father.      I find guys who are abusive funny.  It shows are truely worthless they are.  Guys who leave when they find out they got a girl pregnant but, after only first trying to pressure the girl into getting an abortion.    Why do they do this?  They do this because they are PIECES of SHIT!      The only plus side to things like that are a woman can be strong and leave the abusive guy and make sure he never says another mean thing to her again or touches her and a child is so much better without a father that doesn't want it.    I have to tell all the single mothers out there Congrats because you chose to do the right thing and love your child no matter what.  You chose to do right and know that a shitty father is NOT better than no father and some day a guy will come along who loves you and your child and be the father you dreamed of.         The SHITTY guys out there will miss out on so much and regret what they decide but, it was by their choice and actions that will leave them wondering and sad in the knowledge that they are the biggest pieces of shit in the world and they have no one to blame but, themselves for losing an amazing gift.       At this moment in time I kinda of hope R whose real name is Richard  dies.    I don't really wish death on anyone but, I do hope he gets what's fucking coming to him karma wise.       Okay I am mad but, thats because I am not scared anymore.   I am not scared he will hit me or come after me anymore.  Now, if something does happen to me HE DID IT but, I think if he tried anything I am pretty sure where my anger is that I would beat the living shit out of him if he layed a finger on me.   I should have knocked him out the first time he grabbed me and pushed me back on the bed to take my phone away from me.   Anyways.   I think my rant is over.   I am pretty much done being pissed off though I am still angry and I still HATE HIS FUCKING GUTS.    I swear to God, May GOD help him if he fucking comes near me!